• '18 '17 '16 '11 Moderator

    AUTOMOBILE RAGE

    A man was being tailgated by a stressed out woman on a busy boulevard. Suddenly, the light turned yellow, just in front of him. He did the right thing, stopping at the crosswalk, even though he could have beaten the red light by accelerating through the intersection.

    The tailgating woman was furious and honked her horn, screaming in frustration as she missed her chance to get through the intersection, dropping her cell phone and makeup. As she was still in mid-rant, she heard a tap on her window and looked up into the face of a very serious police officer.

    The officer ordered her to exit her car with her hands up. He took her to the p olice station where she was searched, finger printed, photographed and placed in a holding cell. After a couple of hours, a policeman approached the cell and opened the door. She was escorted back to the booking desk where the arresting officer was waiting with her personal effects.

    He said, “I’m very sorry for this mistake. You see, I pulled up behind your car while you were blowing your horn, flipping off the guy in front of you, and cussing a blue streak at him. I noticed the ‘Choose Life’ license plate holder, the ‘What Would Jesus Do’ bumper sticker, the 'Follow Me to Sunday- School ’ bumper sticker, and the chrome-plated Christian fish emblem on the trunk. Naturally… I assumed you had stolen the car.”

    Priceless


  • That IS priceless!  :lol:


  • Reminds me of the Bill Hicks bit where he relates telling jokes in a similar vein and then being accosted in the parking lot by several audience members threatening bodily harm.

    “We’re Christians and we don’t much like what you said in there. What you think we should do about?” Further punctuated with a shove.

    “Forgive Me,” replies Mr. Hicks.


  • @frimmel:

    Reminds me of the Bill Hicks bit where he relates telling jokes in a similar vein and then being accosted in the parking lot by several audience members threatening bodily harm.

    “We’re Christians and we don’t much like what you said in there. What you think we should do about?” Further punctuated with a shove.

    “Forgive Me,” replies Mr. Hicks.

    RIP, Bill Hicks.

    [attachment deleted by admin]


  • A favorite joke among my people . . .

    “How many Mennonites do you take with you when fishing - one, or two?”
    “Two - if you bring one, he will drink all of your beer.  If you bring two, neither will touch any of them”


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