I find much of the Triple A community to be more abrasive than you described!
I dislike playing solely VE/VJ (I don’t even like the K terms, I stick to the real ones)
So, on to playing both theaters:
As Russia, I typically hit West Russia R1, and not getting too aggressive that turn. AS UK1 I gather the Indian and Australian fleet with 2 Aussie land units in the SZ south of India. May or may not hit the Kwangtun trannny with a plane (depends if I want that plane on my carrier, and the fate of Egypt. Land token UK force in norway (smashing any German air if possible, you usually see 1 ftr/bmr there) or France, if available, or merely build navy in the SZ off France. This allows my American transports to stage off Canada unless the Germans keep a bomber in France.
With the Americans, if the UK keeps th seas clear, I’ll put up a token transport force. relying on UK navy to protect it. 3-4 transports, often will stage in Canada to move to UK fleet protection or Algeria. US 1 sees a transport build on the east, US 2 the next transport, if I didn’t lose any, and land units to fill it. May replace tanks with art on those trannies if I need a couple dollars to fill out a Pacific fleet. If my bombers had no targets of opportunity westward, they often fly to UK. If Egypt survived, or is taken back by UK2 with that Indian fleet, (a typical move of mine) I’ll use the US bombers to bag whatever remains of a med fleet. The US replaces a bomber whenever lost, to have a min of two.
In the Pacific, the US spends whatever income is left after the Atlantic, in many cases when the transports in the Atlantic are not on shore, it can be my full income. I typically don’t begin moving to threaten islands until I have a comparable American fleet, or I can fly-swat Jap planes and avoid ships/place a blocker. If the UK Indian navy is tied in the Med or nailed by the Japs, the Americans will take any high-value islands/land back that it can safely reach. If the Japs built ICs, well, I consider that the best that can happen, as I wil force them to drop money into the water. If they build heavy navy, I have to stay clever and outmove them, or even drop a WUS sub buy/bmr buy to lure them into attacking my fleet/keep my fleet safe.