Chuck Norris

btw, this is not off topic…. this is Chuck’s topic.

when chuck noris came back from vacation in the virgin islands, they were just called the islands

Another firefighter and I were talking about this topic and he showed up one day with a copy of
“Chuck Norris vs. Mr. T: The unauthorized parody”

I don’t think it is worth the $12 Borders wants for it but it was a fun read.

LT

Bill Brasky!!!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bill_Brasky#Quotes

“Bill Brasky once used a live rattle snake as a condom!”
“His poop is considered currency in Argentina.”
“He hated Mexicans! And he was half-Mexican! …And he hated irony!”
“We once had a bachelor party for Brasky. He ate the entire cake before we could tell him there was a stripper in it.”
“He breastfeeds John Madden!”

I think Chuck Norris should be replaced by Jack Bauer. Just my “imo”.

@Subotai:

I think Chuck Norris should be replaced by Jack Bauer. Just my “imo”.

Donald > Keifer

Really, he’s named after a yogurt drink.  How hardcore is that?

Chuck Norris can start a fire with 2 blocks of ice.

Some people wear Superman PJs Superman wears Chuck Norris PJs.

This was funny seven years ago…

And guess what…

It’s still funny.   :-D

whats the only word that rhymes with “orange”?   Chuck Norris

Japan surrendered in '45 because they heard the U.S. was going to drop Chuck Norris on Tokyo.
Macbooks are made out of Chuck Norris’s skin cells.
“Semper Fidelis” is Latin for, “Chuck Norris.”
“Chuck Norris” is English for, “Get down!”
Chuck Norris was your daddy… twice.
The United States Military mines Titanium from Chuck Norris’s teeth.
The U.S. needs only one ally: Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris doesn’t accept whining… ever.
We can’t find Osama because Chuck Norris already got him.

Nobody messes with Chuck. Except Jason Bourne. Sorry. I believe there is one better. :-D

GG

CHUCK NORRIS PUT THE LAUGHTER IN MANSLAUGHTER        :-D

Ya you better not  _uck with Chuck!

For all you Chuck fans. :-D

http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/

Some of the facts are pretty good. I see a few that are already listed above.

A couple of my favorites:

• The original draft of The Lord of the Rings featured Chuck Norris instead of Frodo Baggins. It was only 5 pages long, as Chuck roundhouse-kicked Sauron’s ass halfway through the first chapter.
• Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.
• When Chuck Norris says “More cowbell”, he MEANS it.
• Chuck Norris is the only person who can simultaneously hold and fire FIVE Uzis: One in each hand, one in each foot – and the 5th one he roundhouse-kicks into the air, so that it sprays bullets.

Too many other to list here, check out the link.

Keep your stick on the ice
Panzer
(Or in Chuck’s case, keep the foot in the face.) :-D

Keep your stick on the ice

Are you a hockey player?

Technoviking and Chuck Norris should fight for world domination.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_1nzEFMjkI4&feature=fvw
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xheseQ9o7ww

Originals:
The U.S. Government doesn’t need to wiretap. Chuck Norris already knows everything about you.
The truth is sometimes hard to swallow. That’s why Chuck Norris Round House kicked it into little bite sized pieces.
Any NFL Football Team can trade all their draft picks for Chuck Norris.

GG

@Brain:

Keep your stick on the ice

Are you a hockey player?

Yes, well I actually played hockey with a league for 7 years, but have not been playing much of late, getting a little older now. Its a well used Canadian saying. :-D

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SJ5w4MkFofc

What the heck was that I just watched on you tube?