Most important decision in life


  • My teacher said it is who you decide to marry. What do you guys think? I’m not married or anything, but wondering what everyone thinks here, married or no.

    Personally, I don’t think it’s the most important decision in your life. I see it a more important decision as to what you do with your life - deciding to go to school and get a degree, what job you pick, what you do you in your free time, if you decide to work towards improvement or just become stale. Deciding who you live with and who you have children with is a consequence of your actions - it does not define your life.

    I’m not here to say that marriage isn’t important. I’m here to say it isn’t the most important decision in one’s life.


  • There are a lot of important decisions in someones life.  From what job you decide to have, to what you choose to eat.


  • Well, from a Christian point of view, my conviction is that the most important decision one could ever make is to accept that one needs to get right with one’s Creator and one’s Saviour. Nothing else comes close, because to a Christian, Life is only a grain of sand in the hourglass of time, and all the stuff you have to face and endure in this life will pass all too soon.

    However, that’s not to say that we should just ignore all the day to day stuff, mind you. Even Christians have to be careful of who they choose to marry. Marriage is something that can be so wonderful……and it can also be hell on earth if we pick the wrong mate. For a non-Christian who has another point of view on life, marriage is probably the next most important choice we face. Other than potentially life-threatening choices, nothing else impacts so many facets of life like marriage does, IMHO. I think choosing ot have or not to have children comes a close second. Children sure can turn your world upside down in many ways both good and bad (hopefully mostly good), but I think choosing who to marry (and when) has more potential for destroying your life if not chosen wisely. Everything from finances to friendships to personal health, mental stability, neighborhood reputation, and so much more can all be either enhanced or ruined depending on who you choose to marry. It’s certainly nothing to go into unprepared. And that’s not to say it’s a negative by any means. It can also change your life for the better in so many ways you never even considered if you choose the right mate.

    Rob.

  • '18 '17 '16 '11 Moderator

    The most important decision in life is the one that you have to make that has not yet been made.  All decisions you have made are no longer important and all those you do not yet know of are similarly unimportant.

  • '17 '16 '15 Organizer '14 Customizer '13 '12 '11 '10

    Stay single and childless. Ideas and dreams last longer than people anyway….man forges his creative impulse, while woman brings man back to earthly pleasures. The only real satisfaction comes when you achieve something larger than yourself. It takes training and a partner is only in support as it pertains to her needs.

    Once you have it it can be wiped out in a divorce. Why build for a short term life? The only thing thats for sure is you are committed to yourself and can bring about change in your life.

    I’m sure you’ll marry anyway because its easier to fall into a trap and gain something to get something else of value… companionship. Thats what a permenant girlfriend is for. She can have her own Career and not be bothering you every 5 minutes like some crybaby.

    Bottom line: Your “will” to forge ahead  must remain pure.

    Read Freuds:  “civilization and its discontents” for further info. That book is so true words cannot explain how true.


  • I have to say that there is a strong argument for that “who to marry” thing.  Your partner has an impact on everything about your life.

    For those who said job choice:  Jobs matter little if your life partner is spending money faster than you make it.
    I do agree with the having children thing.  And if you made a bad decision on the marriage front, adding a decision to have children can set up a real hell on earth scenario.

    A close second behind who to marry has to be who to divorce!  I gotta tell ya, if you make a wrong decision on who to marry, that divorce decision is one that can truly save your life.

    And yes, this is coming form someone who DID an 8 year sentence in a bad marriage , fortunately with no children.  Despite inheritances, being the primary wage earner nearly every year of that marriage, and keeping the household financially supported while my Ex got 2 additional degrees after her first college graduation, i came out of that marriage having to borrow the $700 for the seperation papers from my father!

    But a GOOD marriage is definitely the best decision in life.  Financial stability, enjoying every day and the person you share it with, or what i just did… wake up next to someone you really love.  If you have that, a lot of the other decisions are far less important… and far easier to make 🙂


  • It all depends on your circumstances.  Some cases are universal, such as getting married and/or having kids, but other cases are based on your situation at the time.

    For example, some important (as far as pivotal) decisions that I have made would be, in this order:
    Not trying very hard in school
    Moving to New Mexico
    Smoking pot
    Moving back to Pittsburgh
    Joining the Navy

    All those are the most influential events/time periods I can think of that have shaped who I am today.  I haven’t yet gotten married, nor do I have any kids (that I know of) but those will definitely add to the list.  🙂


  • The most important decision in life is what you decide to do in life.  That, or whether you get out of bed each morning.

    Defining your goals is the most important decision because it dictates how you will operate until your goals change.

    Marriage is not the number one decision because marriage isn’t a given for everybody.  Just like going to college, or having kids.  Personally, I don’t feel the need to get married, except for the social pressure, and marriage isn’t what matters in a relationship.  Some don’t want kids and focus on career.  More power to them, but I think children are pretty cool, especially if they are your own.

    Let me reinforce my answer.  I’ve been a drifter in life for a few years now, mainly because I don’t know what I want to do.  I could do anything, but because I haven’t decided, not much is happening.  My best advice is to find what you love, you dream, then do it.

  • 2007 AAR League

    I would say the most important decision in your life is when you decide what kind of person you are or will be. There are probably going to be multiple times in your life when you will have the opportunity to take advantage of a complete stranger and at other times to help one. What you do in situations like those define you. Where you live, what job you decide to do, how much money you make are irrelevant. Marriage and children are big decisions, but know yourself first.

    The second most important decision is whether to buy 4 TP’s or 2 TP’s and an IC with your $32 on J1.


  • It is 2 TRN, 1 IC, and you only get $31, the rest goes to Germany 😛


  • 3 tran 2 inf, don’t take any bid with Japan  :mrgreen:

    4 tran is nice though. That’s all the tran you have to build in one go.

  • '18 '17 '16 '11 Moderator

    SINGLE:  Stay Intoxicated Nightly, Get Laid Everyday!

    And who cares who you marry?  You’re probably going to just divorce him or her in a few years over something trivial.

  • 2007 AAR League

    I tried to divorce myself from reality. Does that count? I’m all better now though. The medication seems to be working.  😛  :lol: And I’m still single but I did all of my heavy drinking in my mid 20’s. Now it gives me heartburn something fierce. And when exactly will I arrive at the getting laid nightly part again. Been a while since those days, too.

    Sorry about hijacking your thread with the Japanese dilemma, Tri. But, never underestimate the power of 4 transports to deter the US from going into the Pacific.

  • '18 '17 '16 '11 Moderator

    @U-505:

    I tried to divorce myself from reality. Does that count? I’m all better now though. The medication seems to be working.  😛  :lol: And I’m still single but I did all of my heavy drinking in my mid 20’s. Now it gives me heartburn something fierce. And when exactly will I arrive at the getting laid nightly part again. Been a while since those days, too.

    Sorry about hijacking your thread with the Japanese dilemma, Tri. But, never underestimate the power of 4 transports to deter the US from going into the Pacific.

    Why would America waste the time?

  • '17 '16 '15 Organizer '14 Customizer '13 '12 '11 '10

    Drinking and smoking is a waste of time!

  • 2007 AAR League

    get married and have many many many kids il…
    they are the natural purpose of life and only think of the ways of every other animal in nature.


  • Life is a waste of time.  Sure, it may be all you have… but most ppl never become more sentient than a rock, or at best a machine.  By the age of 14 most people have sold out what little indivuality they have for the mall and diet coke.  After that they really aren’t alive any more than a computer program… and contrary to popular belief everyone is not a unique snowflake.  They are more akin to cattle being prodded along.  Knowing this chosing to try to be an individual is the most important decision you can make.  Sadly, most people have made up their minds to be drones.

    For those of you who have read Dragonlance I like a quote from it:

    “So what you are saying is there is no hope?”

    “Hope is like the carrot dangled in front of the donkey encouraging it to go further even though it will never reach its goal”.

    “So you think we should just give up?”

    “No, I say removie the carrot and walk forward of your own will”.

    Most people prefer to have the carrot.


  • I like that quote!  I feel like that is the point-of-view that the Navy uses sometimes to prod it’s people along.  But all sailor pessimism aside, I do think it is a very valid way to put it.  8-)

  • '17 '16 '15 Organizer '14 Customizer '13 '12 '11 '10

    Getting married and having children is what society pushes people into doing. Its an unwanted influence used to :

    1. Control income
    2. Avoid stagnation of homogeneous population
    3. Tie people down into little boxes so they can be controlled as a vehicle to sell them a lifestyle where business can sell them things to keep the economy going.
    4. Provide social stability for weak minded types who would “get into trouble” if they didn’t have a family to “use as a walking stick”
    5. government support of families makes it cheaper in the long run for the government to “pay out” during retirement, because they have additional support at home.

    These influences have supported the very laws that make divorce so costly: They ( sic government) wont allow people to keep their wealth, because they want to spread wealth and avoid paying money to support the person who didnt make any. Its just another method of destroying wealth. They hate the idea of somebody having lots of money growing and not being spent. That stagnates the economy because its not being exchanged. And that amoung many other reasons is why you should never marry.

  • '18 '17 '16 '11 Moderator

    @Imperious:

    Getting married and having children is what society pushes people into doing. Its an unwanted influence used to :

    1. Control income
    2. Avoid stagnation of homogeneous population
    3. Tie people down into little boxes so they can be controlled as a vehicle to sell them a lifestyle where business can sell them things to keep the economy going.
    4. Provide social stability for weak minded types who would “get into trouble” if they didn’t have a family to “use as a walking stick”
    5. government support of families makes it cheaper in the long run for the government to “pay out” during retirement, because they have additional support at home.

    These influences have supported the very laws that make divorce so costly: They ( sic government) wont allow people to keep their wealth, because they want to spread wealth and avoid paying money to support the person who didnt make any. Its just another method of destroying wealth. They hate the idea of somebody having lots of money growing and not being spent. That stagnates the economy because its not being exchanged. And that amoung many other reasons is why you should never marry.

    And yet, they havn’t figured out that it’s much better to tax wealth then the creation of wealth.  In that way you hit those guys living on Grand-Uber Pappy’s fortune and don’t steal food money out of the mouths of babies and single mothers!


  • Are you looking back or looking forward.

    Jen’s point…future decisions …is valid.

    But, if you are on your deathbed looking back?

    Or, if you are on your deathbed asking your loved one to pull the plug/shoot you/end your suffering?
    What value have you placed on life? 
    What value are you instilling in your grandchildren?  To end life when they determine it is not worth living.

    Marriage?  If it is to be successful you value the beenefits to your spouse and kids more than your own pleasure/benefit.
    Jennifer ,  Your marriage comment sounds like you believe the crap that 50% of marriages end in divorce.
    Take out the people who marry and divorce repeatedly(x3 or more) and the numbers go WAY DOWN!!!

    Some never marry and in many cases that’s a good thing.  They are too self-centered and/or immature.
    Even that might be considered the most important decision in some people’s lives.

    Adolf Hitler had no kids.  Thank gods!!
    Good for us.
    Good for the NONEXISTENT THEM!

    Many valuable decisions you make repeatedly every day…with or without knowing it.
    You keep your faith…or deny it.
    You stay married or divorce.
    You take that drink or refuse to take a drink…one day at a time.

    The two FOX reporters valued their lives enough to accept Islam on video.
    Now these reporters have valued/or not valued their faith enough to renounce Islam.
    They must value their faith or faithlessness enough to die for it…
    because they now have a target painted on each of them.

    For what decisions are you willing to die?
    For what decisions are you willing to sacrifice those you love?

    Save the world/lose your family.
    Save the continent/lose your family.
    Save the nation/lose your family.
    Save the state or region/lose your family.
    Save Quebec City or Bejing or Mexico City or Canberra or Washington or some smaller city/lose your family.
    Save your village or township/lose you family.
    Save your church./lose your family.
    Save your block/ lose your family.
    Save your kids’ school/ lose your family?

    Is it an important enough decision to think about ahead of time???

    Imperious Leader , 
    NOT having children…
    Look at the Democrat party to see where it gets you….
    Dems are more likely to abort a child.
    Dems are more likely to not have kids.
    Dems are more likely to have 1 or 2 kids(Republicans[rich or poor] are more likely to have 2 or more.)
    That’s why their #s are decreasing.

    Of course, we could talk of minorities & illegals in America having more kids than the white majority…
    but that’s another topic for another thread.

  • '17 '16 '15 Organizer '14 Customizer '13 '12 '11 '10

    Imperious Leader ,
    NOT having children…
    Look at the Democrat party to see where it gets you…
    Dems are more likely to abort a child.
    Dems are more likely to not have kids.
    Dems are more likely to have 1 or 2 kids(Republicans[rich or poor] are more likely to have 2 or more.)
    That’s why their #s are decreasing.

    ++++ what about single parent adoption?

    I dont care about keeping the “numbers up”. Its not about how many republicans/white people are going be reproduced. Its about making smart choices that dont destroy your life. Their are too many things that can go wrong in a marrage. Alot more than what can happen right i can tell you that as a fact! Play the odds and stay single. Dont fall into the trap of “gee i’m worried ill never find true happyness… so ill just get married because it feels right” Good grief get a grip on things and look past that crap.


  • People make commitments they keep. They also fall in and out of some of these commitments.
    Marriage…not always perfect.
    Faith…not always perfect.
    Various brotherhoods from KKK to Omega(balck frat) to Knight of Kiwanis to Spanish Inq. to NAAACP to Al Queda to US Marines to the Skulls, etc…none perfect some doing lil or no good.

    Sounds like your commitment is to yourself.
    Narcisistic. Hedonistic. Selfish.

    I prefer the kinda peeps who helped at WTC or Katrina aftermath.
    Some of them are dead now because they tried to help.

    Or those who pulled the co-pilot outa that plane in Lexington.

    Or the 1000’s who helped search for a missing 3 year old in nearby Cincinnati…
    some missed sleep, some missed work, some both…
    only to find out that someone in the family killed him, burned the body and disposed of it(details as yet unknown.)

    If another kid is “lost” I know lots of those people or others like them will join the next search.

    My commitment is to my family.  Yes, there have been problems, but we have worked through them together.
    Next is my church and then my neighbors.  If something bad happens I’ll help whoever’s closest after my family is as safe as I can make them.

    A little sacrifice on my/your part can make a great difference.
    Seen the movie Pass It Forward?
    It doesn’t always work.

    Napolean, Ghandi, Washington, Ceasar, Alexander the Great, Mother Teresa, Harriet Beecher Stowe, and many others were individuals, but they didn’t accomplish what got done alone.

    For the other side see Stalin, Mao, Che, Sadddam, etc.
    –--------------------------------------------------------------
    No sermon intended. Take it or leave it.

  • '17 '16 '15 Organizer '14 Customizer '13 '12 '11 '10

    I am a slave to my philosophy. It is not a personal self-absorbed pathos. Its based on ideas that have timeless value and do not compromise or accommodate to how i feel or from others “needs”. It is not the need “in- itself” that compells action on my part, rather the objectification of actions is based upon a principle of “self-interest”
    Thus I do not give to beggars because it is not in my self interest maintain their lifestyle w/o some effort on their part to make change possible. Marrage does not serve my self interest because freedom to me is of a much greater importance. I am not going to be encumbered to a short chain of trouble. Many times my “objectification” of the matter provides a much greater support to others around me than what would be possible under your examples.

    I am not clear… did you pull people from Katrina? and WTC?.. If not i really dont see your point at all.


  • @AgentOrange:

    I like that quote!  I feel like that is the point-of-view that the Navy uses sometimes to prod it’s people along.  But all sailor pessimism aside, I do think it is a very valid way to put it.  8-)

    I recall a calendar quote  " The wind and the waves are always on the side of the ablest navigators."

    I guess you can break it down by examining your life so far. 
    Figure out what the “wind and the waves” are going to be in your life going forward. 
    Seek wise counsel on what abilities/materials you will need to manage them well, and then pursue them with a purpose.

    Tri,
    I would imagine that winning A & A players usually examine the board carefully before spending $$ on reinforcements.
    That may be why you started this thread.

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