Gigli … really really bad movie.


  • The critics were right on with this one.

    Its like a long-lasting Seinfeld episode with mobsters and a retarded rapper playing the lead roles.

    J.Lo looked really hot in this one.  She does yoga stretches in exercise attire, dresses sexy, etc., but its your call if the rest of the movie is worth the few glimpses of her bod.  Just so you know, she doesn’t get naked or anything.

  • '17 '16 '15 Organizer '14 Customizer '13 '12 '11 '10

    The best movie J low ever did was that eposide of south park when Cartman’s hand replaced her career… (and her mouth… if you get my drift!)


  • that was the worst southpark episode ever


  • The critics were right on with this one.

    Seriously you needed to be told this.  In sincerely hope you saw this just to appease a girl.  That’s how I saw Titantic(load of crap).

    The best movie J low ever did was that eposide of south park when Cartman’s hand replaced her career… (and her mouth… if you get my drift!)

    And that wasn’t even her! 😄

    that was the worst southpark episode ever

    You Lie!!! 😄

    After that episode I was left with several questions.  Was Cartman really pretending the whole time b/c afterall he did let his hand get intimate with Ben Afflect and secondly why is it Cartman that has had repeated run-ins of being abused/molested/taken advantage of sexually.  Of course I speak of his involvement with NAMBLA and the time when he thought he was a Vietnamese prostitute named Ming Lee.  I would have thought Butters was the most likely to be molested.  Go Figure.

  • '17 '16 '15 Organizer '14 Customizer '13 '12 '11 '10

    After that episode I was left with several questions.  Was Cartman really pretending the whole time b/c afterall he did let his hand get intimate with Ben Afflect and secondly why is it Cartman that has had repeated run-ins of being abused/molested/taken advantage of sexually.  Of course I speak of his involvement with NAMBLA and the time when he thought he was a Vietnamese prostitute named Ming Lee.  I would have thought Butters was the most likely to be molested.  Go Figure.

    Before this thread turns into “south park” woops too late… BTW That Lopez episode was pretty funny IMO. Yes i know she wasnt “performing” a voiceover, because Trey sounds more like her than she even does, and is perfect at portraying her personality. If the real Lopez did that “taco kisses for my ben” song it would have been her greatest hit, because after all she has no talent and a really fat ASS! good greif whats with that?


  • @Imperious:

    a really fat a**! good greif whats with that?

    Some of us like “Ghetto Booties” 😄

  • '17 '16 '15 Organizer '14 Customizer '13 '12 '11 '10

    Well if you enjoy “that” then by all means… IMO if it aint size 6 it has to go!


  • @Imperious:

    Well if you enjoy “that” then by all means… IMO if it aint size 6 it has to go!

    Add 10 sizes and I START to get interested…

    If I wanted to have sex with skeleton, I’d break into a Biology Lab.

  • '17 '16 '15 Organizer '14 Customizer '13 '12 '11 '10

    OMG!  where you find these heffers? size 16?? wtf? do they run that high?


  • Switch, I like your point of view…/there is such a thing a too skinny.  A famous quote says it all better than I could and seem appropriate here… :mrgreen:

    http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/sirmixalot/babygotback.html

    “Baby Got Back”

    [Intro]
    Oh, my, god. Becky, look at her butt.
    It is so big. scoff She looks like,
    one of those rap guys’ girlfriends.
    But, y’know, who understands those rap guys? scoff
    They only talk to her, because,
    she looks like a total prostitute, 'kay?
    I mean, her butt, is just so big. scoff
    I can’t believe it’s just so round, it’s like,
    out there, I mean - gross. Look!
    She’s just so … black!

    [Sir Mix-a-Lot]
    I like big butts and I can not lie
    You other brothers can’t deny
    That when a girl walks in with an itty bitty waist
    And a round thing in your face
    You get sprung, wanna pull out your tough
    ‘Cause you notice that butt was stuffed
    Deep in the jeans she’s wearing
    I’m hooked and I can’t stop staring
    Oh baby, I wanna get wit’cha
    And take your picture
    My homeboys tried to warn me
    But with that butt you got makes me feel so horny
    Ooh, Rump-o’-smooth-skin
    You say you wanna get in my Benz?
    Well, use me, use me
    ‘Cause you ain’t that average groupy
    I’ve seen them dancin’
    The hell with romancin’
    She’s sweat, wet,
    Got it goin’ like a turbo ‘Vette
    I’m tired of magazines
    Sayin’ flat butts are the thing
    Take the average black man and ask him that
    She gotta pack much back
    So, fellas! (Yeah!) Fellas! (Yeah!)
    Has your girlfriend got the butt? (Hell yeah!)
    Tell 'em to shake it! (Shake it!) Shake it! (Shake it!)
    Shake that healthy butt!
    Baby got back!

    (LA face with Oakland booty)
    Baby got back!

    [Sir Mix-a-Lot]
    I like ‘em round, and big
    And when I’m throwin’ a gig
    I just can’t help myself, I’m actin’ like an animal
    Now here’s my scandal
    I wanna get you home
    And ugh, double-up, ugh, ugh
    I ain’t talkin’ bout Playboy
    ‘Cause silicone parts are made for toys
    I want ‘em real thick and juicy
    So find that juicy double
    Mix-a-Lot’s in trouble
    Beggin’ for a piece of that bubble
    So I’m lookin’ at rock videos
    Knock-kneeded bimbos walkin’ like hoes
    You can have them bimbos
    I’ll keep my women like Flo Jo
    A word to the thick soul sistas, I wanna get with ya
    I won’t cuss or hit ya
    But I gotta be straight when I say I wanna fuck
    Til the break of dawn
    Baby got it goin’ on
    A lot of simps won’t like this song
    'Cause them punks like to hit it and quit it
    And I’d rather stay and play
    'Cause I’m long, and I’m strong
    And I’m down to get the friction on
    So, ladies! {Yeah!} Ladies! {Yeah}
    If you wanna role in my Mercedes {Yeah!}
    Then turn around! Stick it out!
    Even white boys got to shout
    Baby got back!

    Baby got back!
    Yeah, baby … when it comes to females, Cosmo ain’t got nothin’
    to do with my selection. 36-24-36? Ha ha, only if she’s 5’3".

    [Sir Mix-a-Lot]
    So your girlfriend rolls a Honda, playin’ workout tapes by Fonda
    But Fonda ain’t got a motor in the back of her Honda
    My anaconda don’t want none
    Unless you’ve got buns, hun
    You can do side bends or sit-ups,
    But please don’t lose that butt
    Some brothers wanna play that “hard” role
    And tell you that the butt ain’t gold
    So they toss it and leave it
    And I pull up quick to retrieve it
    So Cosmo says you’re fat
    Well I ain’t down with that!
    ‘Cause your waist is small and your curves are kickin’
    And I’m thinkin’ bout stickin’
    To the beanpole dames in the magazines:
    You ain’t it, Miss Thing!
    Give me a sista, I can’t resist her
    Red beans and rice didn’t miss her
    Some knucklehead tried to dis
    'Cause his girls are on my list
    He had game but he chose to hit 'em
    And I pull up quick to get wit 'em
    So ladies, if the butt is round,
    And you want a triple X throw down,
    Dial 1-900-MIXALOT
    And kick them nasty thoughts
    Baby got back!

    (Little in the middle but she got much back) [4x]


  • IL, I know you are joking now… Marilyn Monroe was a 14/16.

    And certainly a hell of a lot sexier than that emaciated Paris Hilton.

  • '17 '16 '15 Organizer '14 Customizer '13 '12 '11 '10

    Marilyn Monroe was a 14/16

    She was a pig!  any women before 1980 is ugly, before 1965 it gets worse… IN her time COMPARED with other women …ok you got a point… but for that manner Lucy Ball was very fine before 1945… whats the point? …  Heck probably eithel mertz wasnt a bad broad before 1900…that fat ass thing is a product of those “Urban” thugs who like the beans and rice just a little too much…IMO


  • @Imperious:

    Marilyn Monroe was a 14/16

    She was a pig!  any women before 1980 is ugly, before 1965 it gets worse… IN her time COMPARED with other women …ok you got a point… but for that manner Lucy Ball was very fine before 1945… whats the point? …  Heck probably eithel mertz wasnt a bad broad before 1900…that fat a** thing is a product of those “Urban” thugs who like the beans and rice just a little too much…IMO

    Oh IL… So sad…  You have been invested with the US popular media vision of beauty.  No curves, no softness, no huge titties (unless surgically enhanved which is just NASTY!).

    I am so sorry that you were sucked in by the Hollywood Liberal Elite.  Such a shame that you succumbed to the “Twiggy” syndrome instead of finding yourself attracted to real, honest, healthy, curvaceious WOMEN.

  • '17 '16 '15 Organizer '14 Customizer '13 '12 '11 '10

    And i am sorry you have to now go on a treasure hunt every time you do what you do…Besides a smaller body makes the chest look bigger while those “sofas” you date can barely reach to wipe properly!!!LMFAO!!!

    BTW: sofa =sweater over fat ass.

  • '17 '16 '15 Organizer '14 Customizer '13 '12 '11 '10

    BTW i think i hear that Darth Sedious fellow walking over to lock this productive tangle of much relavence… as he shakes his magic 8 ball… the demise of this thread is at hand…population you?

    Is that how it goes MR.Darth  Maximus?


  • Catherine Hepburne sure isnt ugly dude.


  • Oh IL… So sad…  You have been invested with the US popular media vision of beauty.  No curves, no softness, no huge titties (unless surgically enhanved which is just NASTY!).

    you know what, im sick of the people like this who think that anyone who is attracted to people thought of popularly as “beautiful” has been brainwashed by the media. im sorry if i dont think a heiffer is attractive. i say this in the nicest possible way, i have nothing against fat girls. i just dont find them attractive. same thing for black girls, in general (with exceptions). it has nothing to do with anything other than personal preference. i agree with you that skeletons are not attractive, but i disagree with you about where that starts. i believe Catherine Zeta Jones in Entrapment was a 6, and she was certainly no skeleton. and huge tits are not attractive, IMO. high-C, sometimes into D, but only if they are spectacular, and dont become gross like most big ones. paris hilton is disgusting, she is a skeleton, and a skank on top. skank overrules anything else, imo. if a girl is a skank like paris, i am not attracted, no matter how hot she may be.


  • We’ll just have to disagree on women then 🙂

    Personally, I think there are two type of men… breast men and dead men.  And I am very much alive  :evil:
    The bigger the better, so long as they are real…


  • Rofl best thread ever.


  • This is a cool thread, keep it up Switch. :mrgreen:

  • '17 '16 '15 Organizer '14 Customizer '13 '12 '11 '10

    breast men and dead men

    HUH? I thought you loved those fat gansta asses ? Now you turncoat and start with the brestasis? That will require another thread… i thought this gig was about large latin asses? am i wrong?

  • '17 '16 '15 Organizer '14 Customizer '13 '12 '11 '10

    OK now you have done it: you have been warned…

    Music industry man: What kind of song do you want?
    Jennifer Lopez: Something hot and spicy!
    [melody comes on]
    Jennifer Lopez: Spicier.
    [melody changes]
    Jennifer Lopez: Spicier!
    [spicy melody comes on]

    [Jennifer Lopez (aka Eric Cartman’s left hand)]
    Burrito. Taco taco. Burrito. Taco. Taco taco.
    Don’t think just because I got a lot of money,
    I’ll give you taco-flavored kisses, honey.
    Fulfill all your wishes
    with my taco-flavored kisses.

    Taco taco. Burrito burrito. Taco taco.
    Fulfill all your wishes
    with my taco-flavored kisses! Taco taco.

    [dialogue]
    Music industry dude: She’s fantastic! Who is she?
    Different music man: Believe it or not, her name is Jennifer Lopez!
    First guy: That makes sense, she reminds me of J-Lo.
    2nd guy: Yeah, but she’s younger and spicier!
    Jennifer Lopez (singing): Taco taco. Burrito burrito. Taco taco.
    2nd guy: I don’t think J-Lo would like it very much if we signed this new girl.
    1st guy: No, you’re right. We’re gonna have to fire J-Lo.
    [melody changes]
    Different guy: All right, Ms. Lopez, let’s take it from the top.

    [Jennifer Lopez (aka Eric Cartman’s left hand)]
    Baby, let’s make a run for the border,
    I’ve got a hunger only tacos can stop.
    I know exactly what I’ll order
    three tacos, two tostadas, and a soda pop.

    [Music industry dude]
    Gentlemen, we have ourselves a hit.

    [Jennifer Lopez (aka Eric Cartman’s left hand)]
    I need to make a run for the border.
    If you pay, I’ll take off my top.
    Do you remember what I want to order?
    Three tacos, two tostadas, and a soda pop.

    Yea-ah, and don’t forget the hot sauce, chulo.

    [dialogue]
    Sexy automobile: car driving noises
    Jennifer Lopez: Oh, Ben, I am so happy. The cool breeze blowing through my hair in your sexy automobile.
    Ben Affleck: Let’s spend the whole day together!
    [romantic music comes on]

    [Jennifer Lopez (aka Eric Cartman’s left hand)]
    Oh, Ben, you are so perfect.
    So spectacularrr in every way.
    You bring light into my life, Ben.
    You almost make me forget all about…tacoos!
    Ooh, tacos so good in my tummy yummy yummy give me more.
    (camera noises in background)
    I love you, Ben, you almost make me forget about…tacoooos.

    [dialogue]
    Sexy automobile: car driving noises
    Ben Affleck: Jenny, I have to tell you something. I…I think I love you.
    Jennifer Lopez: Oh, I love you too, Ben! But…
    Ben Affleck: But what?
    Jennifer Lopez: But what if you still have feelings for the slut with the large (BUTT)?
    Sexy automobile: car stopping noises
    Ben Affleck: I still care for her, you have so much more going on…up here.
    Jennifer Lopez: Oh, Ben. Ben…
    Ben Affleck: Jenny, can I kiss you?
    Eric Cartman: NO!!
    Jennifer Lopez: Yes, oh yes, Ben, kiss me!
    Eric Cartman: Aw, (BOB) (DARN) it!
    Jen and Ben make out
    Eric Cartman: Aw, aw, dude!
    Ben Affleck: Mmm, just like tacos.
    Jennifer Lopez: Taco-flavored kisses for my Ben.
    Ben Affleck: You’re so hot, baby.
    Jennifer Lopez: I make you hot, Ben?
    Ben Affleck: Mm, yeah.
    making out continues
    Ben Affleck: Oh, Jenny. Oh, Jenny!
    pants unzip, noises occur
    Jennifer Lopez: Yes…
    Ben Affleck: Oh, (BOB), Jenny!
    Jennifer Lopez: Oh, Ben, my darling!
    Ben Affleck: Oh! Oh! (continues)
    Eric Cartman: Oh, sick! Aw, that’s it, we’re leaving now!
    Ben Affleck: But I love her!
    Jennifer Lopez: Ben!
    Ben Affleck: Jenny! Jenny, I’ll call you!
    Jennifer Lopez: I love you, Ben!
    [music comes on]

    [Jennifer Lopez (aka Eric Cartman)]
    Ooh, baby, baby, can I have your tacos?
    Those tacos sure look good!
    I’m just Jenny from the hood!
    Ooh, can I have your tacos?
    Ooh, I–
    Oh, stop, stop!
    (music stops)
    What the (HECK) is wrong with you!?
    You chulos can’t even keep a beat!
    I deserve better than this!
    I am Hennifer Hlopez!
    Where’s my water?
    Not Evian, Deligrino you stupid (WITCH)!!
    (music industry man whimpers)


  • But IL, it is rare to not have one of those “ghetto booties” on a woman who is not also stacked and racked!  The two kind of go together…  Yes, there are exceptions, just like there are the “crack ho” exceptions for thin women who are built  like Paris Hilton.

    Hopefully not too graphic for this board, but I don;t want bruises afterwards from repeated hard contact with an exposed hip bone.

    Soft, Sensual, Sexual, Voluptuous.

    No size 28+, no size 0, 1, 3.  Just talking the average American built woman… a size 14/16, and the next few sizes up for some additional flesh on the chest, butt and hips.

    Tell you what IL… I’ll leave you all of the size 6 and under.  I’ll take everything 14 to 22.  But I am going to have a LOT more women with a LOT better curves, and almost all of them with natural chests.  While you will have a bunch of anorexic, silicone and saline, addicted to dieting, narccicistic little OC girls.

    I think I’ll have a LOT more fun 🙂


  • Yes, I concur.  Gigli is a very bad movie.  However, there is worse, so I don’t know what the fuss is about.  And “bad” seems to be the modus operandi for any tv or movie production as of late - there are exceptions, and I’m glad for them.

    Now, for the subtheme of this thread:

    Too picky…every one of you…

    If she’s a woman, I’m already in love.  😄

    But, I must say, the extra weight accumulated in pregnancy that tends to remain post-partum is quite a  delight.  So, at the moment I get to enjoy a curvaceous, yet slim young lady.


  • @Jermofoot:

    But, I must say, the extra weight accumulated in pregnancy that tends to remain post-partum is quite a  delight.  So, at the moment I get to enjoy a curvaceous, yet slim young lady.

    It is especially nice when the “Titty Fairy” shows up and adds a couple of cup sizes 😄

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