A Genie appears out of a bottle and asks…

  • Liaison TripleA '11 '10

    A Genie appears out of a bottle and asks…

    “If you had the oppurtunity, to test your mettle, and hold your ground, in ANY famous historical last stand, say for up to 24 hours.  Which one would you choose?”

    Assume of course that the Genie will -reasonably- protect you, so long as you’re not going to do anything outrageously dumb like walk out into a hail of bullets.


  • Does Rorke’s Drift count?  I hated the Zulus ever since Civ II……they’re always war like and uber aggressive (no peace for those a-holes)…kind of like the Federation in “Star Trek: Birth of the Federation”…all they ever want to do is kill…can’t we all just get along?


  • Excellent question. We are watching Aladdin with our 3 year old too!
    Nice one Mallery, but has to be Thermopylae. (Not fond of Persians.)


  • There’s no particular last stand in which I’d want to be, but I’ve always been amused by the rumour that the French Army’s various fortified hilltop positions at Dien Bien Phu – the siege of which ended in a comprehensive French defeat – were allegedly named after former mistresses of the French commander, Colonel Christian de Castries: Anne-Marie, Beatrice, Claudine, Dominique, Eliane, Gabrielle, Huguette and Isabelle.  (I guess de Castries never got around to seducing anyone called Françoise.)  Similarly, the French Army’s initial paratrooper drop zones had female code names: Natasha, Octavie and Simone.

    Anyway, here’s the description of the fall of Dien Bien Phu which Bernard B. Fall gives in his book Street Without Joy : “As the night fell over Dienbienphu that Friday evening – all the rest had fallen – the men could see the waves of enemy infantry surge toward them.  Methodically they went about their business of destroying all the useless weapons and of caring for their wounded; and in the early dawn, led by their commander, the Legionnaires fixed bayonets in the ghostly light of the parachute flares and – 600 against 40,000 --walked into death.”

  • Liaison TripleA '11 '10

    Battle of Berlin…

    Going out in a blaze of glory from the good end of an MG42, against an unstoppable, uncountable, and insurmountable red horde that just keeps coming.

    I suppose Afghanistan or Finland could have also provided the same or better circumstance.

    Either way, save the last round in your side-arm for yourself.


  • @Gargantua:

    Battle of Berlin…
    Going out in a blaze of glory from the good end of an MG42, against an unstoppable, uncountable, and insurmountable red horde that just keeps coming.

    During the Battle of Berlin, there was a Russian tank crewman who put on a spirited one-man last stand.  His tank had somehow gotten isolated during the street fighting for the city and was damaged by a German anti-tank round.  All but one of its crew were killed.  The surviving (though wounded) crewman kept working the main gun, loading and aiming and firing it by himself.  When the main gun ran out of ammunition, or was wrecked by another enemy hit (I can’t remember which), the Russian proceeded to fire the tank’s machine gun at the nearby Germans.  When that ran out of ammunition, he started lobbing grenades out of the tank to drive off the Germans who were pounding on the hull and demanding that he surrender.  A fresh Soviet unit finally arrived and forced the Germans to retreat.  The Russian soldiers got into the wrecked tank and found the last crewman inside.  He was dying of his wounds, but he was holding a knife in his hand, ready to use it on any German soldier who had tried to enter the tank.  After telling the other Russian soldiers what had happened, his final words were, “Thank you, comrades, for not leaving my body in the hands of the Fascists.”


  • @wittmann:

    Excellent question. We are watching Aladdin with our 3 year old too!
    Nice one Mallery, but has to be Thermopylae. (Not fond of Persians.)

    I’d have to agree with you since that battle while a defeat for the Spartans was a morale victory for Greece, and stipulated Strategy is superior to superior numbers.


  • That battle only has meaning because the Persian Navy got pwned….if it wasn’t for the terrible battle at sea, consider Greece conquered, and this damn love affair with this battle would not be so high (and history would greatly would be altered).


  • Yes,  Salamis was probably the bigger Victory. Those Persians did come a long way, only to get beaten every time. (Thank God.)
    Unlike Alexander of course.


  • Sack of Rome by the Visigoths, 410 a.D. - the first time the city fell in 800 years and the end of the Western Roman Empire.

    Just imagine fighting for the capital of the world and watch it fall to the hands of barbarians…

  • '10

    Battle of France

    Show up at the front line, throw down your weapon, retreat and live to smoke cigarettes, drink coffee and have a disposition towards hatred against anyone who isn’t you.

  • '17 '16 '15 '14 '13 '12

    Any Wal-Mart the day after Thanksgiving.


  • Fall of Constantinople 1453


  • Stalingrad.


  • @CWO:

    @Gargantua:

    Battle of Berlin…
    Going out in a blaze of glory from the good end of an MG42, against an unstoppable, uncountable, and insurmountable red horde that just keeps coming.

    During the Battle of Berlin, there was a Russian tank crewman who put on a spirited one-man last stand.  His tank had somehow gotten isolated during the street fighting for the city and was damaged by a German anti-tank round.  All but one of its crew were killed.  The surviving (though wounded) crewman kept working the main gun, loading and aiming and firing it by himself.  When the main gun ran out of ammunition, or was wrecked by another enemy hit (I can’t remember which), the Russian proceeded to fire the tank’s machine gun at the nearby Germans.  When that ran out of ammunition, he started lobbing grenades out of the tank to drive off the Germans who were pounding on the hull and demanding that he surrender.  A fresh Soviet unit finally arrived and forced the Germans to retreat.  The Russian soldiers got into the wrecked tank and found the last crewman inside.  He was dying of his wounds, but he was holding a knife in his hand, ready to use it on any German soldier who had tried to enter the tank.  After telling the other Russian soldiers what had happened, his final words were, “Thank you, comrades, for not leaving my body in the hands of the Fascists.”

    Thats my last stand i would like


  • I’d have to be a spectator at Waterloo.


  • Why can’t i ever have the sex-genie!?

    on-topic: don’t know particular battles, but somwhere in a jungle defending against a wild japanese bayonetted attack would sound fine.
    (Waterloo would be interesting as well)

  • Customizer

    @dinosaur:

    I’d have to be a spectator at Waterloo.

    This one is it for me. To be at Napoleon’s side and have a translator of course.


  • Do you not speak Corsican or Italian,  Most Holy?

  • Customizer

    Nor French. Working on Russian, slowly.

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