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Hitler's Chauffeur


  • 2019 Moderator

    TM mentioned Hitler’s Chauffeur in another post and it reminded me on this story.

    Adolf Hitler is speeding through Germany with his chauffeur at the wheel on his
    way to an important address.

    Driving down a country road, the chauffeur (who is distracted, looking out the
    window at the countryside) doesn’t see a pig walk out onto the road, and he
    hits it with the car.

    Stopping the car, he jumps out, and Adolf climbs out also to see what is going
    on. The chauffeur, very distressed by what he’s done asks Hitler what they
    should do, and Hitler tells him impatiently that they’re in a hurry and they
    should move the pig to the side of the road and go to the address and worry
    about it later.

    All the way to the address the chauffeur, who is a fairly good-hearted person
    despite his employer, is worried about the family who owned the pig and
    wondered how they’d react to discovering the pig, so when they arrived he asked
    Hitler whether he shouldn’t drive back to the farm and let them know what
    happened.

    Hitler agrees before hurrying to the podium, and the Chauffeur hurries back
    down the road.

    Four hours later, stumbling down the road, his arms full of sausage and bread
    and his breath smelling of liquor.

    Hitler in a rage demands to know what has happened to him, and the chauffeur
    explains, “I did what I thought was right. I went to the farm where I killed
    the pig. When I went and knocked on the door and gave them the news, they gave
    me this sausage and bread, fed me the best ale I’ve ever tasted and let me have
    their way with their beautiful nubile young daughter and then sent me on my
    way.”

    Adolf seemed confused by this and asks his chauffeur, “well what exactly did
    you tell them?”

    To which the chauffeur replied "I really can’t understand it either, all I did
    was tell them “I’m Hitler’s Chauffeur, and I killed the pig.”



  • Haha, good historical joke (is it alright if I call it that) you go there! 😉

    But little tidbit about Hitler’s chauffer having to drive backwards has more to do about his Eagle’s Nest in Obersalzberg. Apparently Hitler was so afraid of heights on his way to the mountain hideaway that he forced his chauffer to drive backwards on their way up!



  • Great little story there, I got a good laugh outta it :lol:



  • @TG:

    Haha, good historical joke (is it alright if I call it that) you go there! 😉

    But little tidbit about Hitler’s chauffer having to drive backwards has more to do about his Eagle’s Nest in Obersalzberg. Apparently Hitler was so afraid of heights on his way to the mountain hideaway that he forced his chauffer to drive backwards on their way up!

    Drugs does that to you!


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